1. QUEUEING UP ON LAUNCH DAY
While you’re probably not quite as bad as the folk who queue up over several nights to get their hands on the new products, you do look at them with something approaching jealousy, knowing someone out there has beaten you to it. But come actual launch day, you’ll probably call the boss and tell them you’re going to be a bit late, traffic is mental, and hope that you’ll get into the shop and pick up your new gadget baby before 9.30am.
2. YOU ACTUALLY READ THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL
You want to know everything your new toy (sorry, not toy, we know how much calling them toys upsets you) is capable of. Instead of doing what everyone else does and accidentally happen across its secrets, you sit down and read the manual so you know everything you can do with it before you even turn it on.
3. YOU ALWAYS SEEM TO HAVE THE LATEST VERSIONS OF EVERYTHING… BEFORE ANYONE ELSE
You must know all the right people, because whenever it comes to the Alpha versions of operating systems or new additions to current applications, you always seem to have them before anyone else. Plus thanks to all that Launch Day queue’ing, you’re already bored of your new gadget by the time the rest of us normal are just about getting around to owning one, and you’re already looking forward to the next thing.
4. YOU GET REALLY EXCITED DURING PRODUCT ANNOUNCEMENT DAYS
When the big companies have big product announcements to make, you sit up late to watch them and live tweet all the big news. It’s your equivalent to a big boxing match that’s being beamed live from LA or wherever, when everyone else is already asleep.
5. YOUR GADGETS ALWAYS LOOK BRAND NEW
Within days, us gadget muggles have already scratched or scuffed or scruffed up our new gadgets, but you could have yours for YEARS and it looks like you’ve only just taken it out of the box. How do you do that? Do you use them with safety gloves? Do you rub them all down with a nice shammy every night? Or do you just have everything insured so the second there’s the faintest hint of an imperfection, you get it replaced? You must tell us your secrets!
6. YOU’D RATHER SAVE FOR A GADGET THAN A HOLIDAY, CAR OR HOUSE
Gadgets don’t come cheap, we understand that. But there are OTHER things that you can buy, too. It doesn’t have to be ONLY gadgets, ALL of the time! Your friends are talking about taking a group holiday to somewhere nice and sunny, but that’s right about the time of the launch of your latest want, so you’re going to give the holiday miss. Same goes for literally anything else that isn’t your gadget. You’ve got some discipline, we’ll give you that.
7. YOU’D MARRY YOUR GADGETS IF YOU COULD
When a new gadget enters your life, everything else falls to the side. Friends, family, partners… Jobs, hobbies, even your broken hearted last generation gadgets… This new gadget is your whole life now. You take pictures of the box, you Vine unboxing it, you Instagram what’s inside, you talk about it on Twitter and Facebook at the first opportunity. Yes, unfortunately, you are a Gadget Freak. Not that we’re judging you, because we here at ebuzz.ie are the exact same!